15 Jun Learning how to do “Small Talk”

Is it your worst nightmare to find yourself in the elevator at work with your manager and not know what to say? Or speak with colleagues you hardly know at the office party? What about finding yourself at a function where you know no-one?

Making “small talk”, that is, casual conversation about everyday things is a vital skill in business. It’s how we build rapport and relationships with others as well as increase our social skills. However, this is easier said than done for most of us.

Here’s a few tips to help you master the art of making small talk and becoming a great conversationalist.

Firstly, it may seem obvious, but talk about “safe” topics, that is, topics that won’t cause any controversy or offence. Examples of these could be:

Sport
Films
Music
Travel
….and of course, the weather, as it affects everyone!

It has often been said to avoid talking about religion or politics as these can be sensitive subjects. Other topics to stay away from include anything too private, such as your career, family, personal issues and gossip, especially if you want to make a good first impression.

To hone your conversational skills further, remember these three simple rules:

  1. Ask open-ended questions, such as “what”, “when”, “where”, “why” or “who”. It helps keep the conversation flowing. If someone asks you a question, try not to answer with just a “yes” or “no” as this makes it hard for the other person to know what to ask next.
  2. Be interested in the person you are talking to. This sounds basic, but people will soon start to lose attention if someone doesn’t appear genuinely interested in them.
  3. Finally, learn to listen more than you speak; don’t dominate a conversation.

Next time you find yourself in a business situation where small talk is required, try talking about one of the safe topics listed above and remember the three simple rules.

You will find that the more you practice, the more skilled you will be at conversation and your confidence will increase every time!

If you have any experiences of small talk you’d like to share – or if you have any questions – please leave me a comment.  Also, don’t forget to forward this email onto a friend if you think they would find it useful!